What is home to me?

Considerations regarding my personal savings have for the last, maybe, eight years mainly revolved around the question “how many flight tickets can I afford?” During my youth my dreams for the future have never involved a house and “settling” but rather “where in the world do I go next?”. 

I have felt quite at home in many countries I have travelled to. Almost in every place I have gone I have at some point thought of the possibility of staying on a more permanent basis and considered what I could work with in that particular place.

Like so many other young people of my generation I have an extensive variety of opportunities. These opportunities include travelling to new places. For me travelling equals excitement, new inputs and being stretched and challenged.  The challenge often arises from encounters and situations that force me to ask myself why I think and act the way I do. The last couple of years the overarching question has been “What is home to me?”. The question seems to become more and more pressing and demands to be answered. 

For me traveling has often meant that my life at times has very little continuity in terms of a staying in the same place or being around the same people for a longer period of time. Travelling has truly enriched my life in many ways. However, what I have found is, that I, as many other post-modern people in a world full of opportunity but very little stability, long for something I can call home.   

Not long ago a friend asked me “What is home to you?”. I replied that home is my loved ones. I think friends and family is the best way of creating “home” in a world where there seems to be no limits to the range of opportunities and thereby also a lack of a frame which can create a space of security and sense of belonging. A home. What would be the consequences, if I really want to live what I say? If my loved once are my home; would that mean that I need to change my priorities? Should I instead of planning new travels and consider how I could create myself a life in a new place, try intentionally to invest more in relationships with people I call “home”?.  

My answer to the question “what is home to you”, I must admit, was not well considered but rather spontaneous. I will still have to wrestle with it. At this point of my life I think this will stretch and challenge me even more than any travelling experience.

Meeting my identical twin

This weekend I met a girl from Switzerland. Her family is originally
from Congo. We were in the same small group at a conference I attended
in Frankfurt. When we found out that we both are interested in
international development, we wanted to chat more and decided to
have lunch together.

We talked about our our passion for social justice, our many travels,
about being restless, and how that impacts on your relationships with
other people. We talked about what sense of belonging is when you have
spent shorter or longer times in many places. About settling, etc.

Every other minute one of us would say: I know exactly what you mean!
Hearing her speak was like hearing my own thought spoken by another
person. Some of the things I have formulated in other words myself,
others things I had never said out loud before.

I may never have met a person in my life that I felt so similar to
and therefore also understood by. In my best relationships I
“understand” others because I know the personality of a person and
therefore also understand why s/he thinks or reacts in a certain way.

The fascinating thing about relationship is often the differences,
which on the one hand can frustrate us and on the other hand draws us
to others and fascinates us. However I must admit when sitting by that
lunch table and hearing the person across from me coming to
conclusions on travelling, restlessness, home, etc. which I have also
come to was extremely fascinating too. Besides being fascinated, it
also left me with a feeling of being fully accepted and even a feeling
of “not being alone”.

She had dark skin and long braids and I white skin and flat
blond hair, but personality wise the resemblance was so outspoken that
I considered for a moment if she might have been my real twin – my
real identical twin.